You’re playing a dangerous game Beautiful.
How did it start?
Do you know when to stop?
Better figure it out before you lose…hard.
How long have you been entertaining it?
Stop now before you hurt the people involved or worse…hurt yourself again.
This dangerous game should never had started in the first place.
So tell me Beautiful, how did it begin?
Finally an escape.
An escape to a new place. Far away from the sad reality.
Finally, a breath that’s been held in for so long can be released.
No more pain. No more sadness. No more overthinking.
Start fresh, no need to pretend.
This happiness is real, tangible. Make it last beautiful because this escape is brief.
Make sure to bring it back with you. Keep it close, don’t let that happiness go.
What a year 2019 has been…
You’ve gone through major changes this year Beautiful.
You made decisions that shaped you but also broke you.
You learned a lot about yourself that you never would’ve discovered if you didn’t step out of your comfort zone and left the place you called home.
Throughout the year you made new friends, lost old friends, mended friendships, loved, gone through heartbreak, traveled, mourned the loss of loved ones, lost pieces of yourself, struggled with work and adult life.
Most importantly, you learned to survive through it all.
Goodbye 2019.
Hey babygirl,
Why do you hurt yourself?
Why do you hurt your heart in a way you know it’ll never heal?
Why do you go back knowing he won’t love you the way you want?
You know you need to step back just cut him off. But you can’t.
You would rather hurt than let go of the person who makes you feel safe and comfortable.
You would rather hurt than let go of the person who resonantes with your being.
One with whom you’ve let your guard down completely.
It hurts to see you in this state knowing I can’t do much but watch and give my two cents that reach deaf ears.
I know one day you’ll get out of that hole. One day you’ll see you’re worth more than just hurt. You’re worth more than the love a guy can only give to you as a friend.
I just hope you find strength to put yourself first before you lose yourself completely to this pain.
Hey stranger,
Come vibe with me.
Only for tonight.
Yes, that’s it. Close your eyes.
Do you feel that energy? Pulsing, vibrating in time with the beat?
Let go and feel the vibe.
Let it consume you, lift you, free you.
Let go of all that negativity in your life.
That’s it. Yes.
Doesn’t it feel nice?
Vibe…
Hey Beautiful,
It’s been a while since we have last spoke.
I can see you’re not best right now.
Please don’t say you are.
Don’t hide from me.
I’ve been neglecting you for some time now it’s true. Not giving you enough attention as I should.
Giving others what I should be giving to you;
Taking care of you…
Nurturing you…
Loving you…
You are supposed to be my number one priority and lately you’ve been my last.
I’m sorry beautiful, I’ve let you down.
I know I can’t make up for the past so I’ll say this to you;
I’m here now.
I sit here while I watch you lay in bed with oxygen to help you live.
Useless I feel while waiting until you take your last breath.
Useless while others come to see you and do the same as I do.
Useless because there is nothing else we can do.
I wish I could’ve seen you more. Saved up to take trips and make memories galore.
It hurts me to see you like this, but not as much as it hurts the love of your life and the kids you will leave behind.
I understand you’ve suffered enough.
It’s almost time.
My walls are breaking, cracking, making me feel vulnerable and small in front of you.
I’m scared. So scared to let you in.
You’ll probably hurt me..maybe not.
I’m taking the risk though my heart is holding ground.
Although it’s holding, it won’t be for much longer. You’re getting closer and closer to taking it from my soul.
I thought it couldn’t be possible. I hope you keep it safe if it comes to that point.
I don’t say this enough to you so…
Thank you,
For being there, lifting me up, and keeping me grounded.
Listening to my problems with no judgement.
Giving me advice even when I don’t want it.
Always there even when we are distant.
You’ve been around for a long ass time. Since ’07 holding it down.
I’m grateful our paths crossed. You’ve seen me through the rise and falls.
And you’ll continue to see me through it all.
Bottoms up to you and this beautiful friendship.
Bottoms up to being you.
Thank you.
Do you ever look at the little things in life? No?
A faint smile from the person you care about?
A faint touch from the person you love?
A small random gesture from a stranger?
A small message that can light up your day?
No?
Those little things that go unnoticed is what makes life that much sweeter. Once you see the little things in life you’ll see the magic I see.
So, I’ll ask again…Do you ever look at the little things in life?
Poemas by J 